Do you know you need to change something to do things differently but aren’t quite ready, or you’re not sure if it’s the right thing to do?
Don’t choose to be confused by something that isn’t confusing.
I know I’ve spent more time and energy NOT doing something than actually getting on and doing it and making a difference. It’s so easy to stay stuck and choose not do things differently, even though all the signs are telling us that we need to.
“I can’t tell them that, they’re going through a rough patch right now.”
“I’ll wait until next months. Things are bound to get better and I won’t need to do things differently.”
“But they’re such a great potential customer and they an ideal match for my target client group.”
These are all things I’ve said to myself in the past. Allowing other people and their circumstances to stop me to taking control of my business and do things differently so that I can grow it.
You have a choice to do things differently
- If a customer doesn’t pay you on time, and you don’t mention it, are they likely to do it again?
- If a potential customer hasn’t got back to you after you’ve left 10 messages about the quote they asked you to do, do you think they might not be interested now?
- If your expenses are more than your income for the sixth month running, is it time to do things differently? (And I don’t just mean change the words in your prayer to whoever it is you want to help you!)
Just like Doug Kime says, “Don’t choose to be confused about something that’s not confusing”. You can choose to do things differently and make a difference in your company and your life.
When you run your own business, or you’re in charge of a team, that’s just it. You’re in charge. Yes it’s scary, but in my experience it’s one of the most exciting things in the world too (if it’s never been exciting for you, maybe you’re not doing the right thing. Book an explore call and let’s see). You have responsibility for your business / team / company / life. Why are you letting other people, or what you think other people, may think?
Maybe they’re waiting for you to make that decision so they can get on with their life too? We have this with friends sometimes don’t we? You’ve arranged to meet for coffee and when the time comes you really could use that time more effectively to finish the project you’re working on. But you don’t want to let your friend down as it’s been in your diary for ages and you really want to see them. When an emergency suddenly happens and you do have to ring and cancel, what do you often hear from your friend? “I’m sorry we’re not meeting, but it’s OK. My boss has asked me to work an extra shift and I could really do with the money right now. We’ll catch up soon.” Or something to that effect.
Not only were you stopping yourself from doing something that was better for you with that time, but the impact it had on your friend was that it was a positive change of plans. We can’t always stick to our plans, and need to do things differently. Is that so bad?
Why are we so afraid of doing things differently?
I’d love to hear your thoughts on this question. But we are aren’t we? We don’t want to let others down. We think we’ll upset someone. We don’t like change, “we’ve always done it this way”.
There’s something in us that stops us taking charge of whatever the situation is, and listening to ourselves and the signs and knowledge we’re getting from the environment around us. What if we always listened to ourselves? We’d always get the right answer that’s for sure! Even when we feel our gut instinct about something, we don’t always follow it do we? Well, I haven’t! I’m being honest to help you be honest with yourself.
I remember one time I was “offered a great opportunity to advertise in x”. I uhmmed and ahhhd as it was a lot of money to commit to one advert. Was that going to reach my target audience? Well, the publication was focused at my audience. But it wasn’t as targeted as it could have been. My gut instinct was that it was too much for what it was. I went ahead. My return on investment? Directly from that advert in a national newspaper with a discount code that I could track? NIL. Absolutely nothing. I should have trusted myself and put that advertising budget into something far more targeted and not been blinded by the significance of the publication.
I was afraid of missing the opportunity. At the time I didn’t think about not taking that opportunity which my gut was telling me wasn’t right, trusting that a better opportunity would be just around the corner. I never saw the next opportunity as my budget was already spent. I didn’t get the money back into the business that I’d wanted from my investment, so I had nothing to spend even if I had seen it. I didn’t trust myself. I didn’t trust my years of business experience. I didn’t listen to my gut instinct.
There’s so many reasons why we’re afraid of doing things differently at a particular time. Yet we don’t always recognise them. When I’m working with clients, it’s fascinating that it’s often the simplest question that they find the hardest to answer as they realise that they do have a choice to do things differently. They find it hard to articulate as they often feel embarrassed that it’s taken a coaching session to get them to look at things differently and see different things.
Other people help you see things differently
That’s just it though. Other people do help you see things differently. Whether it’s a paid coach or mentor you’re working with, or a friend or family member who’s good at asking you questions you prefer not to ask yourself. Explore different ways of looking at something will always open up new opportunities and ideas for doing something different. I’ve had coaches be very direct with me in the past. I feel embarrassed now, but the questions they were asking me were obvious ones that I should have been asking myself.
I was blinkered though. I was following my plan and felt that that was more important than trusting my business instinct to change.
Talking things through with someone else will always help you listen to yourself. If you write things down and allow yourself to open up to the flow your mind will often bring, you’ll see different things on the page that you’d kept hidden from yourself.
I use all tools now to help me see things differently, so I can do different things. I’ve been working with an intuitive coach for the past two years which has been incredibly insightful, and helped me focus on parts of my life I’d kept hidden. I set up listening sessions so I can share my thoughts out loud and the listener doesn’t offer any advice or ideas. I have to use my own expertise to work through the options available and commit to a course of action.
You may have friends, mentors and coaches to help you. But you’re still hear reading to the end of this post. You clearly feel something else needs to change but you don’t know what. I hear you. Trust that instinct. Trust that it’s time to do something different to see things differently and get different results.
I’m working with my intuitive coach, Deborah Marie Isis to help you do exactly that – do things differently and learn to trust your instinct. Learning how to listen to yourself is a real skill, and one I’m no where near mastering! We’re running a 5 week training course which will help you develop your intuitive skills which you’ll then have for life, to use and listen carefully in all parts of your life. I’d love for you to join us as you clearly are looking for something different and I know that this skill will help you to listen to yourself more and take action when you know you need to change something. You will simply choose to do it and trust that you’ll have the perfect ending when you make that choice.
You’ll find that you have more time and energy to do more things, as you’ll be spending less on procrastinating about what others think or may feel, or the potential you’re losing. If you know you want to do something different, join us and together we’ll support each other to do different things. I’m really looking forward to see what results you’ll get when you do things differently 🙂
For anyone wondering what to do right now, I’d say go for it! Having worked with Tracey-Jane and Deborah I’ve had many lightbulb moments which have helped me enormously. You won’t regret it!